Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize
