I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
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i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
My life is pants optional.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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