But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
