She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Only a mothe r could love this liver
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
