i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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