i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
