I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
