Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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