she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
