I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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