There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize