Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
