3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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