Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
