So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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