The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Michael Bay diarrhea
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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