I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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