Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
