The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
