Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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