I never want to see another naked old woman again.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
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I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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