Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!

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(508): I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON! http://tfl.nu/qryp

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I just spent $27 on things to pee on.

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(484): I just spent $27 on things to pee on. http://tfl.nu/pmzm

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(301): View more from Maryland

She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.

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(301): She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle. http://tfl.nu/0dzx

Replies (32) Good night (671) Bad night (4046)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.

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(484): i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman. http://tfl.nu/dzx3

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(805): View more from California

He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.

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(805): He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have. http://tfl.nu/ny5u

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(203): View more from Connecticut

the problem with open bar is i never know what to get

(781): View more from Massachusetts

did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."

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(203): the problem with open bar is i never know what to get (781): did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..." http://tfl.nu/knqb

Replies (10) Good night (5694) Bad night (1034)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?

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(262): Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU? http://tfl.nu/jzba

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(631): View more from New York

I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday

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(631): I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday http://tfl.nu/jy9z

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.

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(412): I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila. http://tfl.nu/4mhj

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.

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(402): I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing. http://tfl.nu/1xq6

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(519): View more from Ontario

Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning

(416): View more from Toronto

Thats for me to know and you to find out.

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(519): Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning (416): Thats for me to know and you to find out. http://tfl.nu/ors0

Replies (1) Good night (1048) Bad night (325)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me

(1-724): View more from Pennsylvania

He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.

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(724): Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me (1-724): He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit. http://tfl.nu/ml5w

Replies (5) Good night (1292) Bad night (311)
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(912): View more from Georgia

Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.

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(912): Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever. http://tfl.nu/pxkj

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(319): View more from Iowa

"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.

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(319): "Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits. http://tfl.nu/w2vw

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(816): View more from Missouri

Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown

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(816): Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown http://tfl.nu/kwyi

Replies (2) Good night (331) Bad night (115) Order T-Shirt

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