Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.

  (376): View more from

  you are insane

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere. (376): you are insane http://tfl.nu/nfoh
  Replies (12) Good night (3601) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her http://tfl.nu/2ej3
  Replies (35) Good night (603) Bad night (3811)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU http://tfl.nu/x7kk
  Replies (76) Good night (6308) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more. http://tfl.nu/blv6
  Replies (17) Good night (760) Bad night (8807)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here. http://tfl.nu/4k59
  Replies (65) Good night (2892) Bad night (5375)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"? http://tfl.nu/n06e
  Replies (16) Good night (6712) Bad night (1358)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar. http://tfl.nu/lyc1
  Replies (8) Good night (2369) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach. http://tfl.nu/qjk8
  Replies (1) Good night (1063) Bad night (1051)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on (484): Who said I was judging? More like congratulating. http://tfl.nu/coiy
  Replies (10) Good night (2190) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease. (507): Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits. http://tfl.nu/blof
  Replies (18) Good night (2731) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness. http://tfl.nu/pn5t
  Replies (0) Good night (1038) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/rb31
  Replies (7) Good night (1099) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!

  (281): View more from Texas

  All I did was send my mom an ecard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): Body shots with my MILFs MILF!! (281): All I did was send my mom an ecard http://tfl.nu/9e20
  Replies (2) Good night (514) Bad night (289)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now http://tfl.nu/r2zb
  Replies (0) Good night (488) Bad night (240)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day. http://tfl.nu/ddu7
  Replies (4) Good night (699) Bad night (170)

Randomize