I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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