I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
