Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
