oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
