I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
