So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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