apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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