even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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