For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize