it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
