K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
We named our party play list daddy issues
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize