whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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