I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
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I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
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He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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