my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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