Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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