Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old