I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Don't make out with my wife yet
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here