How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
