we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
