i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
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I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
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Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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