i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize