Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
