That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
sarcasm needs its own font
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
