Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
