Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He? As in you personified your dick?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
