she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
