Me. At least after what I've been through.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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