There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize