i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
